Chuck Rates The Tight Ends

Jeremy Shockey, Cleveland Todd Heap, Albuquerque Tony Gonzalez, Dakota

 

1.  Dakota Lumberjacks:  T. Gonzalez, E. Conwell – I’m biased here, but I feel Gonzo has re-applied himself to be the best, and the O will be not as powerful with Holmes getting beaten down more, thus Gonzo getting more looks.
2.  Albuquerque Bandits:  T. Heap/C. Lewis – Heap is playing in a horrible O, but will be the #1 option, question is who is chuckin' the rock?
3.  Cleveland Rocks:  J. Shockey - Hey big mouth, you feel that pain in your chest, that’s a cracked rib courtesy of your damn mouth. Keep talking, and it will only get worse. When healthy the human bulls eye is right at the top.
4.  Rocky Mountain Cougars:  M. Pollard/F. Wycheck/C. Cleeland – Bill wised up and took good depth at a weak position, and thus has the best depth in the league. Now about that pesky little RB problem………
5.  Minnesota MoJo:  S. Sharpe/D. Clark – Ol' original biggie mouth is still spoutin', but backing up his words in Den. Plummer likes his target, so don’t be surprised with a repeat of past glory.
6.  Orlando Jaguars:  D. Jolley/D. Graham – Ted has the up and comers in Jollies and Graham cracker. Will this be the year they put it together?
7.  Tempe Hippos:  A. Crumpler/M. Ricks – Another as above, 2 guys with huge potential, and once Vick gets healthy, Crumpler will be a force.
8.  Brunswick Lions:  R. McMichael – Randy is carrying the unit, but the rookie may make some noise before the season is over.
9.  Washington Rainiers:  Franks – I just can’t get a warm and fuzzy over Capt stoneheands, if they were so confident in him, why did they bring in a broken-down-beat-up-old-glory (Walls)?
10.  Danville Doppelgangers:  S. Alexander/E. Johnson – Hey guess what, while Boston is massaging Marty’s neck, Alexander will be holding him down. Can you say 30 catches? Johnson may get more time here.
11.  Blue Rigde Falcons:  B. Miller/J. Stevens – Miller has shown great potential, and Stevens…. umm hit storefront bad, drive while drunk bad, catch TD good, (can’t see how on earth this rock graduated from my beloved UW), stay with me Jeremy, catch TD good…... 
12.  Fremont Raiders:  K. Brady/W. Walls – Hey Joe can you get any TE’s older? Maybe with an AARP card and a Denny’s senior discount you can get the total # of TD’s these guys will catch this year.